Hi Everyone,
I kept my promise and wrote again this week. I've been studying patterns of self-destruction and the opposite - catalysing behaviours that positively accelerate our growth. I've also been analysing the effort we put into relationships, parenthood, and in the sense of being. I came to a realisation that almost every aspect of our lives demands a lot from us. What we usually do when our personal lives seem to be asking a lot from us is to reassess the situation and ask why we constantly feel drained - then we either set clear boundaries, harness the power of saying NO or simply adapt to the reality of things. This can also be applied to work, and today I want to highlight the power of positive adaptability (if the internet can come up with "quiet quitting", I can come up with my own terms, too😄).
Imagine a scenario where you have just got out of a romantic relationship, and while reflecting, you realise you didn't set boundaries at the beginning of the relationship. Usually, this realisation tends to follow you through to the next relationship (sometimes it also doesn't). This need to apply life lessons to situations by constantly reflecting and improving ourselves isn't only for the personal areas of our lives. Work does demand our ability to reflect, introspect, and apply our learnings a bit more regularly than we are usually prepared for. It can feel overwhelming sometimes, but it is definitely beneficial and crucial to consider going into your next job with a list of lessons from a previous job or workplace. This ability to adapt positively to situations involves a high level of self-awareness, reflection and the willingness to grow and change.
I use the term positive adaptability because being adaptable (even though mostly regarded as positive) can often drive us to situations that leave us hurting in the dark (all in the name of adaptability). However, if we focus on making sure being adaptable leads to a positive experience (or teachable moment because we always can't predict), we tend to eliminate passive aggression (which often comes with the 'adaptable' territory at work) and advocate for ourselves, our needs and a favourable outcome for all involved.
Consider this an example: You are asked to give up a project you have spent a lot of time on that you also really enjoy at work due to a reduction in the headcount of the team. In the name of being adaptable, you give that project up (albeit passive-aggressively) but further down the line, you realise that you are unmotivated and have lost your sense of agency and autonomy. In this case, positive adaptability is like advocating for yourself and sharing what kind of projects on the team will help you stay motivated and engaged. This is about plugging into the existing options but still on your terms and communicating this in an emotionally intelligent way with the team objectives and success in mind.
Staying focused on self-improvement is not only important in our personal lives but our work demands that from us too. Different stages of our careers call for an upgrade in life and work skills, and we must adapt positively as we grow our careers and advance to leadership positions. Therefore, self-advocacy becomes a non-negotiable, especially as a leader because it helps us stay adaptable, improves our wellbeing, and empowers us to request the job control and resources we need to handle the demands of a job (job demand, control theories of "Work & Wellbeing").
I'd love to know if you regularly take inventory of your work skills and call yourself to order. I know I hadn't always done this, but I can't seem to live without it now. 😊
xoxo.
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